FAQ
Frequently asked questions.
After thirty-something years of teaching, I have heard every version of every difficulty a student can have with this work. Here are the most common questions and what I tell my students about them.
About the book
Who is Life Sorted for? Anyone whose life feels a little too busy, too noisy or too far from the person they meant to be. New parents. Self-employed people running small businesses. Adults living with ADHD. People recovering from a hard year. Quietly stressed workers who can’t tell anyone they’re not coping. You don’t need any prior meditation experience.
Is this a religious book? No. It borrows from many traditions, in particular Buddhism, Hinduism and Christianity, because the practices were refined in those settings over thousands of years. You can take what is useful and leave what is not. The eight sessions stand on their own without any belief at all.
How long does the course take? Eight weeks if you do it as designed - one session a week, daily audio practice, small exercises woven into your day. Some readers go faster. Some take a year. The only way to fail this course is to stop opening the book.
How much practice a day? Twenty minutes is plenty. Some days will be five. Some days will be forty. Quality, not quantity.
Do I need to buy anything? A chair. A few minutes. A willingness to start. That is all. Later sessions suggest a candle, a journal, a pair of headphones - none essential.
About the practice
My mind won’t stop. Am I doing it wrong? No. The practice is not to stop the mind - the mind doesn’t stop until you do. The practice is to notice when the mind has wandered and bring it back, gently, without judgement. Every return is a tiny rep of the meditation muscle. If your mind wandered fifty times in twenty minutes, you got fifty reps. That’s a good day.
I keep falling asleep. Two possibilities. You are exhausted - the body is using the practice to catch up on sleep. Don’t fight it for the first week or two; let it have what it needs. Or the time of day is wrong - try practising in late morning or early evening rather than late at night. If it persists, sit upright in a kitchen chair, eyes slightly open, soft gaze on the floor a metre in front of you.
I cried during the audio. I don’t know why. This is normal and welcome. The body holds emotion. When the body softens, the emotion sometimes finds the door. Let it. Don’t analyse it. Don’t tell yourself a story about it. Breathe. Continue. If heavy emotion arises repeatedly, consider seeing a counsellor or psychologist alongside the practice. Meditation is wonderful, but it is not a substitute for trauma support.
I missed five days. Should I give up? No. Start again from one. Twenty-one consecutive days isn’t a punishment - it’s just how habits cement. You haven’t failed. You’ve simply learned that something this week was bigger than the practice. That happens. Restart tomorrow.
I hate it. It feels like a chore. This often means you’re trying too hard. Drop the formal practice for a day. Have a long mindful cuppa instead. Walk slowly around your garden barefoot. Eat dinner in silence. Let mindfulness be a relief, not another item on the list. If it still feels like a chore after a week, you may be doing the wrong practice for you. Try active meditation if you’ve been doing seated. Try seated if you’ve been doing walking. Try the audio if you’ve been doing it unguided.
I had a panic attack during the meditation. Sit up. Open your eyes. Find a fixed object in the room - a chair, a window, a candle - and rest your gaze on it. Breathe out longer than you breathe in. The longer exhale tells your nervous system you are safe. When the panic passes, don’t return to the same practice that day. Have a cuppa. Walk in the garden. Try again tomorrow with a shorter practice and your eyes slightly open. If it recurs, please speak to a mental health professional.
I don’t feel any different. How long until I do? Two weeks is too soon. Three months is when most students start to notice. Six months is when other people start to notice. A year is when you can’t remember the person you were before. Sometimes the change has happened and you haven’t noticed because you are too close to it. Ask someone who knows you well: “Have I changed at all in the last six months?” You may be surprised.
I feel guilty taking this much time for myself. Read this twice. You are no good to anyone - your partner, your children, your work, your friends - if you are running on empty. Twenty minutes a day for your own mind is not selfish. It is what makes you available to everyone else for the other twenty-three hours and forty minutes.
I started for stress, but now I’m asking really big questions. Welcome. This happens to almost everyone. Sit with the questions. You don’t need answers immediately. The questions themselves will reshape your life over time. If they become destabilising rather than enriching, find a teacher, in particular a real human one who has walked further down the path than you have.
About Robinanne and the work
Are you a doctor or psychologist? No. I am a teacher of mindfulness and meditation, with a teaching background and decades of practice and study under teachers I trust. The book is informed by the research, but it is not a substitute for medical or psychological care. If you are struggling, please see a professional. The practice is excellent alongside therapy, not instead of it.
Do you teach in person? I have taught for over thirty years in colleges, universities, retreats and small groups. I am no longer running a public weekly class, but I do still appear at occasional retreats and workshops. The newsletter is the easiest way to hear about anything I am doing.
Can I email you? Yes - the contact page has details. I read every message. I cannot reply to all of them in detail, but I read every one.
Can I share the audio with a friend? Of course - tell them where to find the book and the audio, so they can have their own copy. Word of mouth is how a small book finds the people it can serve.
Read more about Robinanne - See the eight sessions - Stay in touch